Love Does not Seek Its Own




[Paul said,] “I have been a constant example of how you can help those in need by working hard. You should remember the words of the Lord Jesus: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive.’” Acts 20:35


Happiness is a unique commodity. It is never found by the person shopping for it. Lonely men and women in every age have admitted the futility of their search for happiness, most notably King Solomon in the book of Ecclesiastes. This wealthy, powerful king, with servants to cater to his every whim, found most things in life to be tedious, meaningless, and devoid of joy.


Most of us get married assuming that we are going to be happy. After the wedding, we find that our mate does not always seek to make us happy. Perhaps our spouse even demands more and more of our time, energy, and resources for his or her own happiness. We feel cheated and used, so we fight for our rights. We demand that our spouse do certain things for us, or we give up and seek happiness elsewhere.


Part of the apostle Paul’s definition of love in 1 Corinthians 13 is that it is “not self-seeking.” Genuine happiness is the by-product of making someone else happy. I wonder what would have happened if King Solomon had found someone to serve? Don’t the Scriptures say, “It is more blessed to give than to receive” (Acts 20:35)?


Do you want to be happy? Discover someone else’s needs, and seek to meet them. Why not begin with your spouse? “How may I help you?” is a good question with which to begin.

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