Making Room for Quality Time

O God, you are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you in this parched and weary land where there is no water. Psalm 63:1-2

How much time do you spend with your spouse each day? Chances are, you are apart more than you are together, if you don’t count the time you are asleep. That’s pretty normal. One or both of you are likely working, and normally we don’t work at the same place.

When you are together, how much time do you spend actually talking with each other? One hour a day? Probably not. Most couples spend less than thirty minutes each day in conversation. Much of this is spent on logistics, like, “What time am I supposed to pick up Jordan from soccer practice?” When do you have quality conversation, where you talk about issues, desires, frustrations, and joys?

Why not start with fifteen minutes a day? Call it couple time, talk time, or couch time. What you call it is not important. What is important is that the two of you spend quality time each day talking and listening to each other. Not only do you exchange information, but you communicate that you care about each other.

As believers, we may make time with God a priority but not time with our spouse. When King David wrote Psalm 63, he vividly expressed his longing for time and communication with the Lord, comparing it to water in a dry and weary place. Time with God refreshes us spiritually, and quality time with our spouse refreshes us emotionally and relationally. Quality time sends a strong emotional message: “I think you’re important. I enjoy being with you.

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